ABGW - Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful

Why Your Boundaries Fail And How To Keep Them

Cheryl Paris Season 3 Episode 58

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Boundaries don’t need to be dramatic to work; they need to be steady. We wrap our mini series by turning vague requests into clear limits you can hold under pressure, even when your calendar is crammed and your stress is high. Instead of chasing the perfect speech, we practice one boring, repeatable line that keeps you calm and consistent.

We break down the subtle but crucial gap between asking others to behave differently and deciding how you will act. You’ll hear simple scripts you can plug into your day right now: “I can do X by Friday or Y by Wednesday. Which do you want?” to create clear choices, and “I’m happy to help. What are we deprioritizing to make space for this?” to force alignment on trade-offs without a fight. Then we move from theory to action with a tiny step: send one short email that states what you’re doing, what you’re not, and what you need. No backstory. No overexplaining. Just a calm pattern you can repeat.

We also talk about the emotional side of boundary work: the urge to justify, the wobble after pushback, and the myth that growth must look tidy to be real. Progress often looks like a slower breath, a shorter reply, a cleaner calendar block. For extra support, we point you to our emotional first aid kit and the companion blog post with deeper examples and language you can copy and adapt. If you’ve struggled to keep boundaries, this gentle, grounded approach helps you build limits that actually hold.

If this helped, follow the show, share it with a friend who’s running on empty, and leave a quick review telling us which line you’ll try first. Your steady practice makes the biggest difference.

The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers

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SPEAKER_00:

Welcome back to ABGW Amazing, Brilliant, Gorgeous, Wonderful. This is the final episode in this mini series. No fireworks, just steadiness. So when boundaries don't work, it's usually because they were requesting uh I'll say that again. When boundaries don't work, it's usually because they were requests, not limits. Or they weren't held consistently. For me, a boundary isn't a sentence, it's a pattern. So pick one phrase, okay? Keep it boring. Remember, this is about experimentation. I want you to think about this. I can do X by Friday or I can do Y by Wednesday. Which do you want? Feel the urge to explain, but let it pass. Repeat the same sentence. One tiny action today might be to send one email that clarifies what you're doing, what you're not, and what you need. One meeting line to keep. I'm happy to help. What are we deprioritizing to make space for this? Now, remember all these mini episodes has an accompanying blog post on her guru.co.uk that goes into much more detail about what we're doing here. Okay. What I want you to remember is just notice what you notice in each episode. Okay. If you smile, sigh, or if you recognize yourself somewhere along the way, you know what? That's progress. You know, one of the things that's really important to me is to understand that growth doesn't have to look tidy to be real, it doesn't have to be in a nice straight line. Do you know what I mean? Growth is growth, and it's about learning. And if you want something steady to return to, like I said, I created the emotional first aid kit, and that's waiting for you at her guru.co.uk. Go gently. You're doing the best that you can, you're doing better than you think you are. Remember, there's the blog post if you want more detail. And remember that every step you take, no matter how small, is a step towards a brighter, more balanced future. Trust in your journey and remember progress is progress, no matter the pace. I hope you're all doing well. Bye for now.